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Funny Bible Verses About Marriage

Everyone loves to laugh and if a joke is used in the right context, it can really bring people together. In this guide, we will review the FUNNY BIBLE VERSES ABOUT MARRIAGE, funny bible verses taken out of context and short bible verses for wedding cards. The Bible is full of humorous stories and isn’t afraid to poke fun at things. And because there are so many funny Bible verses about marriage, they’re a perfect fit for weddings and any other special event that brings people together!Funny marriage Bible verses that make great blog titles. Funny marriage Bible verses offer short and sweet inspiration for your blog. Use our funny marriage Bible verses to start a discussion on divorce, being single, or loving someone who is already married.

Fun Bible Verses About Marriage. Its a great blessing when two people join in the bond of marriage. But have you ever thought of the verses in the bible that talks about marriage? This book is full of over 300+ quotes from the Bible, which will lead you to have a closer walk with God, keep your marriage fresh and vibrant, help you build a strong foundation for your family and encourage you on your daily walk as a Christian spouse and parent.Enjoy a good laugh with this collection of some of the funniest scripture verses about marriage. These funny Bible verses are sure to give you a bit of comic relief when you need it most.

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Funny Bible Verses Taken Out Of Context

Some people might give an exaggerated yawn at the concept of reading the Bible. But the truth is that the Bible is much more interesting than most of the trashy novels that have come out the past couple of decades.

Why read about one night stands when you can delve into the language of whole hearted, passionate, married love in Scripture?

There are so many fascinating bible verses about love in Scripture. The Bible offers beautiful, uplifting, and even practical  advice on love. As we strive to live out a perfect (or perfect as can be) love that is supported and blessed by Christ, the Bible is a great resource for Catholic singles today.

But while a majority of Scripture is beautiful, on the other hand, some bible verses about love are just plain weird.

There are a lot of resources for Catholics online to learn about Sacred Scripture, but in this post  we’ll be talking about:

  • How to read through weird bible verses about love
  • The top 6 bible verses about love that leave you scratching your head
  • Why those passages can still teach us something about love

Funny Bible Verses About Money

Isn’t it amazing how the most important book in the world is one of the most misunderstood? Theologians spend their entire lives trying to decipher the meaning behind the pages of the ancient text.

While many bible verses about love may make more sense if you are a scholar, some read downright strange for the average person.

Take for instance Solomon 7:8: “I say, ‘I will climb the palm tree; I will hold its fruit!’ May your breasts be now like grape clusters, and the scent of your breath like apples!”

I’m sorry, what?

How to Interpret the Guidance

It’s possible to truly understand what Jesus is saying to us through Scripture. However, we need to study the text and learn to read it through the eyes of those who work tirelessly at breaking down the message from its original translation.

It could be that you turn to online Bible commentary, or small study groups through Church. Breaking the Word open and pouring over its true meaning can bring some fascinating revelations that apply to our everyday life.

It can also help us decode some of the more unusual Bible verses about love. Palm trees anyone?

Here Are The Top 6 Weird Bible Verses About Love and What They Mean

There are quite a few verses in the Bible verses about love that may leave you wondering what the author was thinking. Here are six of the Bible verses about love that made us do a double take (an what they actually mean!).

1.) Proverbs 5:18-19 – “May your fountain be blessed, and may you rejoice in the wife of your youth. A loving doe, a graceful deer— may her breasts satisfy you always, may you ever be intoxicated with her love.”

What are the two purposes of marriage?  Procreation and unity. It is a fitting then, to ask that one’s fountain (fertility) be blessed.

From the beginning of Scripture we are told to go forth and multiply. Proverbs 5:18 is asking that, as a reward for a pure life, man’s wife be fruitful in bearing children.

This passage describes woman as a loving doe. The comparison to a doe is significant because deer are often chosen as symbols of strength and beauty.

“May her breasts satisfy you always,” is a wish that just as the infant is nourished by the breasts of its mother, so too the husband will be satisfied by his wife.

God intended for man and woman to enjoy intimacy and Solomon advises his son to enjoy the pleasures of marriage.

2.) Proverbs 12:4 – “A wife of noble character is her husband’s crown, but a disgraceful wife is like decay in his bones.”

This bible verse may seem weird at first, but once you dissect it, it actually makes a lot of sense!

First of all, we have to realize that the crown is a metaphor here. The crown stands for honor – in that when a wife is noble, she brings her husband a sense of honor.

But what does that mean?

It means that a wife who is faithful in her duties as a wife and mother, it’s a woman who will make her husband shine.

Those duties could consist in being a stay at home mother, the keeper of the house, or a career that compliments the marriage well. But if they’re done done well, they strengthen the relationship and bring honor to the marriage.

A woman who causes her husband grief, however, will cause a slow decay to his mind and his soul.

“Disgraceful” here can mean many things. Unfaithful, slothful, arrogant, stubborn, etc.

If a wife cannot keep harmony in the home or relationship, if she does not remain true to her husband and/or her vocation, it will weigh heavily enough upon her husband that it could destroy him.

3.) Proverbs 30:18-19: 18 – “There are three things that are too amazing for me, four that I do not understand: the way of an eagle in the sky, the way of a snake on a rock, the way of a ship on the high seas, and the way of a man with a young woman.”

These particular verses from Proverbs speak about fascinating things of the world that are mysterious and awe inspiring in their own right.

The eagle. It flies the highest and fastest of all the birds, yet we don’t know where it goes.

The snake on the rock which is mysterious. It creeps upon and descends it without noise or any trace that it was ever there.

The ship that can wade through the most angry waters of the ocean, travel through storms and brutal conditions from country to country. It seems to defy scientific laws of gravity and motion.

The fourth amazing thing in this verse, “the way of a man with a young woman,” speaks of young love between two faithful partners.  Attraction and love are two beautiful gifts from God and when experienced correctly, can be amazing to witness.

Love and marriage between and man and a woman, is a beautiful and holy experience and a type of relationship with Christ.

All four things mentioned help us understand the invisible laws that can accomplish such a feat.  The impossible becomes possible.

It is a perfect analogy to the Bible where we are asked to believe in spiritual things that we cannot see.  Because we understand the laws of faith and life in Jesus, we know they are real.

4.) Colossians 3:18-19: – “Wives, submit yourselves to your husbands, as is fitting in the Lord. Husbands, love your wives and do not be harsh with them.”

This verse is a plea for wives and husbands both to submit to the edification of each other. By wives honoring their roles in the marriage and husbands doing so as well, their unity can be good and pleasing in the eyes of God.

While it may come across a bit sexist upon first read, Saint Paul actually is giving some pretty solid advice here.

He lays out instructions for how to maintain a peaceful and successful Christian home.

Looking at the original meaning of the text, easily lost in translation to English, the word “submit” was actually written meaning “To have a voluntary attitude of cooperating”. So Paul isn’t saying, “do or die”, but rather imploring women to heed the advice and respect the opinions of their husband.

So too are husbands given obligations to their wives. Colossians 3:19 urges men to practice the same sacrificial and selfless love for their wives as Jesus did for his Church.

It is “fitting” to God, meaning it is good, if the man is a good Christian head of the household and the wife is an actively supportive spouse and partner.

5.) Proverbs 21:19 – “It is better to dwell in the wilderness, than with a contentious and an angry woman.”

A wife should be a comfort to her husband and bring peace to the home.  She should be supportive and love him through all that life throws at them.

A wife who is rude or angry, who constantly finds fault with her husband or his friends, one who is never pleased and always agitated about something, is not good for a man’s soul.

While it is easy to take this verse at its most literal meaning urging man to go dwell in a vast wilderness and forsake the shelter of luxury, man is actually being told that it would be better to remain single and chaste than to engage with a woman who would bring him misery.

6.) Proverbs 27:15-16 – “A continual dropping in a very rainy day and a contentious woman are alike. Whosoever hides her hides the wind, and the ointment of his right hand, which betrays itself.”

Rain that falls constantly with no breaks, over and over, like the raindrops that seep through the roof and into the bucket on the floor, produces and discomfort and annoyance.

So too does a contentious woman cause grief to a man in his own house.

A man who has to deal with an annoying or obnoxious wife cannot feel comfortable in his abode.  Her harping on or ridiculing him becomes like fingernails on a chalkboard or, as the verse above references, the raindrops that keep coming and coming.

Trying to hide a contentious woman is like trying to hide the wind that causes the leaves to rustle and trees to sway.  It is impossible. Trying to silence her is unfruitful as she will become louder than a resounding gong.

Holding oil in the hand is another analogy of silencing a contentious woman.  Oil cannot be held. The tighter you grip it, the faster it slips through your fingers.

short bible verses for wedding cards

  1. Marriage is like a paper cut. It’s painful, it happens to everyone, and there’s no quick fix.
  2. Marriage is the only way to get drunk without paying for it.
  3. The difference between a husband and a wife is that one of them is the sweetheart you married and the other one is the devil you got married to.
  4. The best way to keep your marriage young is by giving your wife what she wants every night at bedtime—and then going to sleep yourself as soon as possible.

Conclusion

The Bible is a fascinating book of buried treasure which must be uncovered slowly and steadily over time.  Like divers on a mission to recover the fruits of a sunken ship, so too must we walk alongside the biblical scholars who help bring light to the true meaning of verse after verse of wisdom and guidance – including these Bible verses about love that, at first glance, are somewhat confusing!

Weird, practical, strange and interesting, everything in the Bible is there for a reason.  Take the time to understand even the oddest passages, and you’ll increase your spiritual knowledge dramatically, hopefully having fun in the process!

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